i’ve been listening to this song this week by jenny lewis called rise up with fists.  i do that.  listen to one song over and over until i know all the words.  this song, which has a little bit of an attitude, is fitting my level of cynicism this week.  sometimes it feels like everything you do is sort of going up against a big brick wall and splashing into a puddle on the ground.  mud.  what’s the point, you know?  everyone else is doing it.  no one else cares.  i am the only one.  you are all alone.  whatever.  i know i sound like a teenager.   but as these stupid words/lies have filled my head this week, i have used this song to sort of smile through it.  more like smirk.

so here’s the first verse that i really really like.  sorry i can’t do that nifty thing where you can actually listen to the song.  but i’m sure you can find it.

What are you changing?

Who do you think you’re changing?

You can’t change things, we’re all stuck in our ways

It’s like trying to clean the ocean

What do you think you can drain it?

Well it was poison and dry long before you came

But you can wake up younger under the knife

And you can wake up sounder if you get analyzed

And I better wake up

There but for the grace of God, go I

postscript

i have to give props to robert davidson for my introduction to this song.  the guys in our family exchange cd mixes at christmas every year and i finally get around to robert’s cd during late summer or early fall.  no offense robert.  it just takes me a little while to get through them…you know since i only consume about one song a week.  and this year robert’s was a two volume.  i actually pilfered it from the bowels of the big mongo church van that taido drives.  both cd’s have issues, skipping around numbers 10 and 11.  rise up with fists is only number 8 (we spent a very long time on number 6, which i still haven’t quite given up, but i know 11 skips because it is the song cole likes on the cd so whenever i’m not looking he just moves the track up.  he’s ticky like that.